The Independent-Recruiter’s Reality: The Feel and the Real

Feelings can’t be trusted.  A few years ago, I read that on the reception area wall of a recruiting firm I didn’t want to work for.  When you are a recruiter, feelings can’t be trusted but they can get the best of you and take you for a road trip you do not want to be on quite frequently.

I knew the Recruiting Coach from various recruiting “things.”  I would find myself saying, “amen”, to most comments she made.  I think most of us recruiting types enjoy working with like-minded recruiters.  We are slow to trust, so we use like-mindedness as a baseline for a relationship.

My calls to Rebecca have increased over the last 12 months.   If I dissected those calls, and I do, I found that I felt better after them.  Sure I would call to vent and complain.. and bitch – but I was looking for solutions.  The solution was not feeling better – although that helped.  The solution needed to be real and tangible.  You know the solution is going to be metrics – of some kind.  I knew that.

When I worked for an “agency,” I think my feelings didn’t really get in the way.  I had to appear professional in my workplace – internal responses could not translate to external responses.  I would have been fired for destroying property or at least tripped over when I was in the fetal position in my cubicle quad.  Okay, It was really never that bad but I was always surprised when my phone didn’t crack from an occasional slamming.

On our week 1 Official (meaning paid) Coaching Call, we discussed the metrics I am going to measure – the real stuff.  She wants me to track two things.  I can handle two.  We also discussed where feelings enter the landscape.  We discussed a beautiful metaphor, I was surprised I had never heard before, for managing my day – especially the first few hours.

Sure, feelings can’t be trusted neither can willpower be relied upon to reverse course.  A bad day is often times more than jut a day.  I can’t have that, you can’t have that – we can’t afford it.  When I become my feelings, I need to come to the end of myself – now.  It takes someone besides yourself to do that, Recruiter.

-VIR

Job Coach

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